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Saturday, 7 December 2013

Do you want to stay clear of type two diabetes ? masturbate more !

According to the main site of diabetes.co.uk.

"New research suggests that masturbation is good for your health and may even help protect against diseases such as diabetes.

Following on from a recent U.S. survey which revealed that the vast majority of men (94%) most women (85%) admit to masturbating, scientists in Australia say they have found evidence that self-pleasuring by touching one's own genitals can help improve overall health by lowering the risk of diseases like cystitis, type 2 diabertes and prostate cancer.

Writing in The Conversation, a website where experts can write opinion pieces, researchers Anthony Santella, a public health scientist at the University of Sydney, and senior lecturer Spring Chenoa Cooper explain that masturbation can have numerous benefits for both men and women.

In women, self-pleasuring can protect women from cervical infections and urinary tract infections (UTIs) through a process called 'tenting,' which occurs as part of the arousal process. "Tenting stretches the cervix, and thus the cervical mucous. This enables fluid circulation, allowing cervical fluids full of bacteria to be flushed out," they say. 

For men, masturbation can help reduce the risk of prostate cancer. Earlier studies have shown that men who are sexually active are less likely to develop prostate cancer, which may be due to the release of cancer-causing toxins from the prostate gland. According to Santella and Cooper,masturbation achieves this same effect. 

They add that masturbating may even cut the risk of type 2 diabetes in both sexes (though this may also be explained by better overall health), reduce insomnia through hormonal and tension release, and help stave off depression and boost the body's immune system by raising levels of endorphins - the brain's feel-good chemicals - and the hormone cortisol.

Furthermore, the pair explain that masturbation is also "the most convenient method for maximizing orgasms," and that regular orgasms help boost self-esteem, reduce stressblood pressure and pain, and improve pelvic floor strength through the contractions that occur."


Well there you have it folks, maybe I could have stayed clear of diabetes if I had masturbated more. I won't be telling my friend Dr. Jay Wortman, a type two diabetic and low carb expert. I wouldn't want him to think I had gone completely batshit. "scientists in Australia" Indy sort these cretins out ! Jeez what will the boffins come up with next, the mind boggles. The $64000 question is, how much wanking or jerking off do you have to do ? My right arm already looks like Popeye's ! Maybe it's all the spinach I eat, that's my excuse.

Nice find John

Eddie

Link to wankers anonymous here.


18 comments:

Indy Jill said...

Damn - it's a bit late to tell us all after we're already diagnosed, ain't it?

Marc said...

LOL!! Switch arms for uniform development.

Anonymous said...

Not Convinced.
Sid has D, yet he is a total w*nker!

Duck Fiabetes

Anonymous said...

Didn't work for you, Graham, Defren or Grazer.

Lowcarb team member said...

Anonymous said...
Didn't work for you, Graham, Defren or Grazer.

Your right I probably didn't spend enough time on the practice, could be due to the fact the women in my life negated the need.

Graham

Lowcarb team member said...

Marc said...
LOL!! Switch arms for uniform development.

Way to go Marc you'll keep diabetes a bay.

Cheers
Graham

Anonymous said...

This blog is proof of the absurdity of the claim.

Its full of individuals that are no stranger to palm and her five sisters.

And your all ill with hairy hands.

Regards

Dr Paul Jones - University of Carmarthen

Mrs Palmer said...

"This blog is proof of the absurdity of the claim."

On the other hand it could offer conclusive proof that your a total wanker Dr Jones.

Lowcarb team member said...

Jonesey said...
This blog is proof of the absurdity of the claim.

Its full of individuals that are no stranger to palm and her five sisters.

And your all ill with hairy hands.


Back again Jonesy you can't keep away can you, I thought you'd gone off to pastures new!

I should imagine your disdain for the fairer sex would leave you short of female companions, this in turn would explain your non-diabetic status.

Just remember Marc's words of wisdom Switch arms for uniform development.

Kind regards
Graham

Anonymous said...

Graham mumbles -

Back again Jonesy you can't keep away can you, I thought you'd gone off to pastures new!

Its DR Jonesy to you Graham. I'm saving what will be an Atomic Bomb blow to lowcarbs dogma for another forum.

I will post it once I've got it proofread, but it will shut you lot up for ever.

And can we have less of the profanity, you do know that you old cantankerous git's that you did not invent foul language.

Regards

Dr Paul Jones - University of Carmarthen

Lowcarb team member said...

I like you Jona, I'm gonna eat you last !

Eddie

Anonymous said...

"Atomic Bomb blow to lowcarbs dogma for another forum."

Or alternatively it could be a WMD for diabetics foolish enough to listen to you.

LCF

Lowcarb team member said...

Jonesy's ego wittered...

Its DR Jonesy to you Graham. I'm saving what will be an Atomic Bomb blow to lowcarbs dogma for another forum.

Perhaps if you acted more in a way befitting the title Dr I might consider addressing you as such, but till then I shall continue to use whatever term I think fits your behaviour on this blog.

I will post it once I've got it proofread, but it will shut you lot up for ever.

Wow I can't wait for the amazing revelations to unfold, If you so wish we will post it on the blog just send us a copy. I do hope the proof reading will be conducted when your sober you know what your like after a few shandys.

I don't know why you don't contact DUK the diabetes charity as they spend millions on research, if your so confident of the mind blowing conclusions to your paper you could save them a fortune.

And can we have less of the profanity, you do know that you old cantankerous git's that you did not invent foul language.

Ok I can accept old git but the rest is sheer hypocrisy.

Kind regards
Graham

Anonymous said...

Graham mumbled -

Wow I can't wait for the amazing revelations to unfold, If you so wish we will post it on the blog just send us a copy.

Email address Graham, you do know what one of those is. I'm not going to comment on the rest of your reply as it twaddle.

Regards

Dr Paul Jones - University of Carmarthen

Lowcarb team member said...

Dr Twaddle said...

Email address Graham, you do know what one of those is. I'm not going to comment on the rest of your reply as it twaddle.

Email address not sure, would it be something like this lowcarbdiabetic@aol.com

I remember getting one of those in the early 90s, it was a bit different then with the dial up modem, connecting was a bit hit and miss then. My first ISP was madasafish great fun it was too, bonkers newsletters were sent out from a Captain Codpiece that added
a personal touch sadly missing these days.

Anyway I digress, just a couple of points I need to address.

If you use the title Dr in your Atomic Bomb of a post please add a disclaimer that you are not medically trained and have no qualifications in either diabetology or dietetics. If your article includes the use of supplements please be aware many are contraindicated with prescription medications.

If your referring to a plant based
diet the Christmas period may not the best time, the large majority of diabetics are omnivores and will have all ready ordered their turkeys.

Lowcarb team member said...

In my last comment I forgot to add:

Kind regards
Graham

Anonymous said...

Graham mumbled-

If you use the title Dr in your Atomic Bomb of a post please add a disclaimer that you are not medically trained and have no qualifications in either diabetology or dietetics. If your article includes the use of supplements please be aware many are contraindicated with prescription medications.

A bit presumptuous, you’ll staring to come across like a impertinent onik.

For your information, I’m not a fan of supplements as I don’t see the benefits of them or any solid evidence that the work. The evidence points to supplements like vitamins only giving you expensive wizz (that’s piss or urine if you want to get technique for those reading this from the wrong side of the pond)

Regards

Dr Paul Jones - University of Carmarthen

Lowcarb team member said...

Jonsey drunkenly slurred…
Graham mumbled-

“If you use the title Dr in your Atomic Bomb of a post please add a disclaimer that you are not medically trained and have no qualifications in either diabetology or dietetics. If your article includes the use of supplements please be aware many are contraindicated with prescription medications.”

A bit presumptuous, you’ll staring to come across like a impertinent onik.

Am I a bit presumptuous to suggest that when you wrote that sentence you were intoxicated again?
And you really need to cut back on the alcohol; you’re starting to come across like a drunken oaf.

For your information, I’m not a fan of supplements as I don’t see the benefits of them or any solid evidence that the work. The evidence points to supplements like vitamins only giving you expensive wizz (that’s piss or urine if you want to get technique for those reading this from the wrong side of the pond)

No I’m not a great fan of supplements either though I do take omega 3, but there are certain circumstances (long term metformin use e.g.) that type 2 diabetics can become deficient in B12 this is also a common occurrence in vegans/vegetarians; this is usually treated with injection’s now that must be really expensive urine. Vitamin D is another were deficiency can be problematic and not only for diabetics.

Readers from the wrong? side of the pond may be interested to know that wizz is a British slang term for illicit drugs not urine.

Kind regards
Graham